Love stories...

AlexandraAnn wrote:I was hoping that there would be a lot more happy endings in here, but I suppose that all that has been said in here so far is proof that there Is someone out there that understands how you're feeling. That, all on its own, makes the pain worth it.

I just keep hoping that one day someone will stumble into my life and it'll be like magic. The past won't matter, the future won't matter- all that will happen is Then. A girl can dream.

Aw.. I hope you find someone! I wish there were more happy endings too, but that doesn't seem to happen as often as the sad endings. :/

My story is still being worked on. I've had two boyfriends, and have been figuring out with each that guys aren't really my thing. The last one knows that but still wants to try 'us' again. I feel bad for him, but I really don't think that it would be fair to either of us. There is this girl that I was (and kind of am) interested in, and she is bi, so I kind of asked her out. She said no, because her morals are against it. Now she isn't talking to me. So I'm attempting to move on, but there aren't a whole lot of lesbians or bisexual women that I run into at my school, so I'm on the stuck end. Plus I feel like we still need to talk everything through to give both of us some closure, but she isn't responding to my attempts at communication. :/ Updates on my love life or lack of it can be posted later if anyone is interested.

rainlover wrote:Aw.. I hope you find someone! I wish there were more happy endings too, but that doesn't seem to happen as often as the sad endings. :/

My story is still being worked on. I've had two boyfriends, and have been figuring out with each that guys aren't really my thing. The last one knows that but still wants to try 'us' again. I feel bad for him, but I really don't think that it would be fair to either of us. There is this girl that I was (and kind of am) interested in, and she is bi, so I kind of asked her out. She said no, because her morals are against it. Now she isn't talking to me. So I'm attempting to move on, but there aren't a whole lot of lesbians or bisexual women that I run into at my school, so I'm on the stuck end. Plus I feel like we still need to talk everything through to give both of us some closure, but she isn't responding to my attempts at communication. :/ Updates on my love life or lack of it can be posted later if anyone is interested.

Thanks It's certainly true that you find sad endings more often than not, but I'm still absolutly elated when I find people that have been together for YEARS and are still so deeply in love that watching how they interact with each other makes you blush and grin like an idiot. Those relationships are what I'm aiming for. Those are what give me hope, even through the times that I really just want to give up completely.

I can understand how you don't want to try again with your last boyfriend. Neither of you should have to deal with how hard that could be. Just give it some time and maybe he'll understand. Maybe the girl will come around. Sounds like she was a bit caught off guard by the whole situation to me. But even if she doesn't I get the feeling that you will end up with someone that you find yourself excedingly happy with. Just keep that flame of hope burning and everything will work out as it should.

AlexandraAnn wrote:

Thanks It's certainly true that you find sad endings more often than not, but I'm still absolutly elated when I find people that have been together for YEARS and are still so deeply in love that watching how they interact with each other makes you blush and grin like an idiot. Those relationships are what I'm aiming for. Those are what give me hope, even through the times that I really just want to give up completely.

I can understand how you don't want to try again with your last boyfriend. Neither of you should have to deal with how hard that could be. Just give it some time and maybe he'll understand. Maybe the girl will come around. Sounds like she was a bit caught off guard by the whole situation to me. But even if she doesn't I get the feeling that you will end up with someone that you find yourself excedingly happy with. Just keep that flame of hope burning and everything will work out as it should.

My parents have been together for years. :p They are still very cute. I think their story should totally count.

Aw, thanks! I'm hoping for someone... I will be keeping my fingers crossed for you as well.

rainlover wrote:My parents have been together for years. :p They are still very cute. I think their story should totally count.

Aw, thanks! I'm hoping for someone... I will be keeping my fingers crossed for you as well.

That's great! Having parents that are still together are always something good to look up to.

Thanks, I'll do the same for you!

I think I just realized something about this thread...

There are so few happy endings because the happy love stories aren't ending. The story's continuing, and that makes it harder to tell. Those of us with disasters on our hands, loves that have ended, have a complete story, ready for the telling. We have a beginning, a happy middle, and an end that ties it up - not always neatly, but it makes it easier to tell.

Love stories in progress are the happy ones! And we've seen a few in here. But they're few and far between; after all, people in love are very busy people!

carl-E wrote:I think I just realized something about this thread...

There are so few happy endings because the happy love stories aren't ending. The story's continuing, and that makes it harder to tell. Those of us with disasters on our hands, loves that have ended, have a complete story, ready for the telling. We have a beginning, a happy middle, and an end that ties it up - not always neatly, but it makes it easier to tell.

Love stories in progress are the happy ones! And we've seen a few in here. But they're few and far between; after all, people in love are very busy people!

True! You've given me hope now!

I wish I had some wonderful story to tell, but alas, I do not. I have zero luck when it comes to romance. Any crushes I have go unspoken. Recently I managed to ask a girl out. My friends had been urging me too. I didn't think she was interested but tried anyway. She was nice about turning me down and we still talk.

I wants a girlfriend *sigh*

Keep trying, my friend. You've taken an important first step, and you never know; the next girl may well say yes!

Funny that your instincts were right, and your friends were wrong. Well, not funny, but there's a lesson to be learned - you'll know love when it's there. Find the girls who like you for you, make more friends who will give you more friends... friends make the best lovers in the end, they are the ones who actually care about you.

Of course, they also know all your foibles and weaknesses, so they're pretty hard to impress. Am I talking in circles here?

Whatever, just don't be shy. You'll never find anyone that way!

I have a really cliche story.

It started this time last year. I started dating this really great guy named Nick. I liked him a lot, but we never really clicked. In the three months we were dating we only went on maybe three dates. It was more like playing house than dating. It was maybe two months into the relationship and I realized that I had feelings for my friend. Her name was Nicole. Now this presented two problems. One was that I was still dating Nick, who was actually in love with me and I didn't want to break his heart. The other was that I was just now realizing that I was a lesbian. I kinda had a panic attack over that one. I was fine with homosexuals, I just never thought I was one. Although in hindsight, I realize I really knew from the beginning. Anyways, so I kept dating Nick for another month. When I broke up with him that really ended our friendship. As well as my friendships with several other people. When I came out it was even worse. My mom was fine with homosexuals as well, but having that homosexual be her daughter was a totally different story. It was hard for her. Fast forward a month and Nicole and I are dating. I am the happiest person on the planet. My first kiss was with her in the rural cemetery. We saw each other nearly every weekend. We were nearly inseparable. We would sneak out of classes to see each other. We lived in two different towns, but I got to see her every day at school. Those were the best days of my life so far. Then the summer came. I got a job and we didn't see each other nearly as often. However, we had started making plans for after college. We were going to buy a house. Get a dog. I wasn't allowed to get a mastiff. I was only slightly upset about this. Then the summer ended and she went off to college and I stayed behind at high school. Things got worse. There were weekends when I couldn't see her. And she thought I wasn't trying hard enough. And then there were weekends when she couldn't see me. And I didn't think she was trying hard enough. Then, to make it worse, she met Elaine. Elaine was there when I couldn't be. Elaine had a car and money. Elaine could drive, and Elaine wasn't 4 hours away. Nicole broke up with me in September, 3 days before our anniversary. She was the first person I ever truly loved.

I know it sounds like typical teenager love, when the kid first realizes that maybe it wasn't true love. But it still hurts. I still can't think about it without crying. I know I'll probably move on eventually, and find someone else.

*hug*

Was it worth it?

Yes. It was most definitely worth it. I will always love her, no matter what. "It's better to have love and lost than never loved at all"

And in the end I'm a hopeless romantic.

I think the story of how I got together with my current girlfriend is a little interesting. Short but sweet.

I'm currently a freshman in college and the first time I met Kristina, my girlfriend, was in sixth grade. We were always swiming around in the same social groups but never really got the opportunity to really talk. Honestly I wasn't really in a dateable condition--free of all closets and denial--till my senior year of high school.

Even though she really caught my eye I didn't think I'd have a chance with her and therefore didn't spend the time or effort crushing on someone it'd never ever happen with. I'm disgustingly logical that way. Besides I wasn't sure she was still into girls. You know how kids are in high school, gay one day straight the next. (Like I'm one to judge)

Anyhoo, after graduation I became good friends with one of her good friends and we began to hang out. With encouragement from our friend--a valiant hetero man--I asked her out on a date. Shockingly she said yes!

Now we've been offically been going out for about three months and she's going to be my first valentine. It took about seven years, but it's definitely worth it. I'M ALL KINDS OF SMITTEN. C':

D'awwwwww...

This one's a greatly condensed version of how me and my current girlfriend started dating...

We actually met in highschool before I had transitioned. we had the same P.E. class. I don't remember how we started dating then, it just somehow ended up happening. We'd kiss before class and hold hands in the hall and were generally very couple-y...However highschool was probably the period of my life where I was going through the most angst over my gender. I was constantly aware of what male puberty was doing to my body, I was determined to stop it before it had finished running it's course. I was irritable and empty, I got very little sleep. Most friends of mine from this time will recall that I was almost always sick, coughing up a lung, and I carried nasty handkerchiefs that I used to blow my nose on every 10 seconds.

When I got home I would lose myself online, learning all that I could about trans issues, trying to find a therapist nearby, but it was always the same thing: "We don't deal with that..." "We don't deal with that..." "We don't deal with that..." My anxiety took it's toll on me and Alex. <Humerous side note: she once gave me a wedgie...it was so brutal that my underwear broke> I was on autopilot basically, I would tell myself transition was where I was headed but it all felt so far away. And Alex? How could she ever understand...I broke up with her without ever telling her I was trans, we remained friends but that ended badly too. I told her to stop hanging around me so much, it depressed me to see her as she was, so sad. For what? What had she lost? I was a horrible boyfriend, I never took her out, I couldn't even bring myself to care.

It gets a lot simpler after highschool...3 years later I was sitting around at home, I saw her sign on to AIM and thought "why the hell not?". So I told her everything. It's different when you don't feel like you're headed nowhere. We became good friends; I thought she was straight and she thought the same of me. I took note however, of the fact that she visited me everytime she could (she had gone to college in another city). She pointed out once that she didn't always visit everybody. She was never awkward about the fact that her exboyfriend was a girl now, she even told me once "If we dated now, I'd be way out of your league!" There was one time in particular where I realized I had feelings for her. I don't wear much makeup but she loves the stuff, I remember her trying some on me. I could feel her breath on my cheeks, it smelled nice. I felt really happy that she was so close to me, that she was comfortable enough...but then I thought I was reading wayyy into it. When I bring this up now she always tells me that was the first time she wanted to kiss me. I wanted to also, but I'm..a bit shy.

Nothing happened till she came out and said "I have something to say but it may alter the course of our friendship"...Fast forward...and, we've been dating for a year and a half now. Her parents are...not as supportive as mine, but it doesn't really get us down very much, especially since we live together. People look at us and say the stupidest things sometimes: "Please give me some money ladies, God may not bless you but I sure will!" "Are you guys part of the lesbian protection squad?" But it doesn't even register. Anyway, this is getting pretty long. Here's a roughish comic about us now:

Spoiler:

Like everyone and their mom, I have an autobio comic in the works. It pretty much goes online this week.

Some of you might remember my romance story from a while back. My Army girl who i was still excited about even after 2 years and all that stuff.

Well, I dunno really why I am posting it here, but it was a story, and when a story ends I guess that ending has to be told.

It was a great relationship. It really was. We went on holiday for the fourth time over christmas, even went skydiving. The day after we got back I woke up and asked "What's the plan?" and she turned to me and said "We need a break."

I was so shocked I didn't know how to react. After a while and a small conversation about exactly what she meant by "break" it was pretty obvious she wanted us to end. I asked why. What did I do that was so wrong. I asked "Do you still love me?" she said yes, "Are you still having fun? are you sick of me?' she said no. So I just asked why. She said she wasn't exactly sure why, but she didn't want to do it any more. A week later she called me and asked if we could still be friends, but still coudn't even tell me what changed.

I still loved her, so i told her no, we couldn't be friends just yet, and if i was to have any chance of getting over her I couldn't have her calling me whenever she felt like it acting all chummy. So now I have good moments and bad ones, feeling that i might be able to get over her and be happy, and complete and utter patheticness.

I am still trying to figure out the lesson in all this, but it seems to be more a lesson in heart ache than anything really profound.

I haven't been to the forums for a while, mostly because of life changes. But I have been reading the comic, and I am still nonplussed by how creatively the story is unfolding.

I return to my forum post to talk about another happy situation involving a lost love, which I hope may be at very least a good friend again.

When I was 12 years old a new family moved into my neighborhood. They had 3 children, the elder two were close to my age, with a little brother who was only 7. We got along well. The older of the brothers was my age, and the daughter was a year younger than me, so we were good friends a few days after they moved in. The elder brother, who we'll call Chris, and I hung out most. He always spoke of their older sister, who sounded like the awesomest girl ever. I said once I wanted to meet her.

Didn't think it would ever happen.

Apparently Chris told her about me too. Their sister, who will be called Dorcas, told her I could sing and that I was cute. She was going to move in with them that summer, but I didn't find out about it until the day after she got there.

Picture it: New Jersey, 1995... a young boy goes to his friends' house to play outside and gets a shock.

Chris told me to wait on the porch while he went to get his sister (at the time I thought he meant Dorcas) and down comes what could only be described as a teenage goddess who will be called Artemis. She had just gotten out of the shower, her hair was still wet, and she was wearing a bathing suit top and shorts. At 12, I was surprised I could speak after seeing her. The first thing she said to me after we were introduced was "my sister told me you could sing, will you sing for me?"

And sing I did.

Every song I could think of.

And the more songs I sang, the more she smiled.

We too got along well.

I'll never forget the game of tag that one summer night...the sun was setting and we were in their backyard, which had major shade trees. Almost no light got into their yard, and their mom was hanging sheets to dry on the clothesline in the yard. I was the fastest kid on the block at the time, so no one could get away from me when I was "it". I had caught everyone but Artemis at the time, and she knew I could catch her.

She ran behind the sheets.

I followed.

She stopped and turned to face me. She said "Give me a hug." So I hugged her.

Then I said what my heart screamed since the day I first met her.

"Give me a kiss."

This is still the most memorable kiss I've ever had. It was the kind of kiss innocent teenage kids give each other, where an attempt at sensual kissing was made, but didn't quite happen. I loved her soft, thick lips as they pressed against mine. We only kissed for a moment, but it felt like it lasted a lifetime.

I was convinced she wanted to be with me as badly as I wanted to be with her.

I think by now you guessed I was wrong.

Heartbreak was around the corner.

She had a giant crush on one of the other guys on the block, who I had known for years. She wanted me to fix them up. No self-respecting kid would set someone else up with the girl they liked, so I stayed out of it. Until Artemis asked me if I thought he was a good guy. I said yes, because he was, and I did want her to be with a good guy.

But I had to know if I was on the list for guys she wanted to be with...

So I asked her if she had any other guys in mind.

"No."

I cried my eyes out that night.

They got together, were together for a while, and split up over a dumb argument. He came to ME for advice on how to get her back.

A second time, I did the right thing and kicked myself for it. I gave him good advice on how to fix everything. It worked. How do I know? Artemis showed me a letter that contained essentially everything I told him to say. They stayed madly in love for years and I lost touch with them when their family moved away two years later.

I saw Artemis once more before we lost touch completely. I was 15, and went to visit them in their new home. We all talked about the old times like we hadn't seen each other in 30 years. I could feel the sadness creeping up on me as I left that day.

I didn't see her again until about a year ago, when I saw her drive by my street. It was good to see her, but a fleeting thing for me.

Or so I thought.

Yesterday, I checked my Myspace account which I hadn't been on in months. There was a message in my inbox. Thought it was spam or something.

It was a message from Artemis.

She had been trying to add me for a while, but I had the email verification on.

I added her, and we talke for a little bit. She said she wants to spend some time with me. I like the idea of it. After all, she sought me out, and I was able to connect with someone I was desperately in love with.

I want it to go well, but I'm afraid I'm going to jinx myself if I'm not careful. She was and is so amazing to me, so of course I don't want anything happening. I refuse to let a 13 year silence become an eternal one for my stupidity.

There will be more when things develop.

Well good luck to you. I hope things work out.

I've been away from the forums for some time myself. Been trying to get past the whole 'friend zone' thing with this girl I'm in love with. (I've gone on about her before in this thread) I haven't given up on her, even though she's turned me down before. I've begun to see a gilmer fo hope when it comes to her. She talks to me more, confides in me about some of her problems, she's asked me to give her a ride home from work a couple of times, she even went out to a club with me and some other people from our job for my birhtday last week.

We hung out together all night, we couldn't talk much because of the noise volume, but we laughed at the drunk people, I bought her a drink, and I got to take her home where I talked to about when my dad died. She said she had a good time as well. My only regret from that night is that I didn't ask her to dance. Everytime I tried to the words just stuck, not wanting to come out. I had hoped she would be able to go to Sakuracon (An anime covention in Seattle) agian this year, but she can't make it. *sigh*

Progress, lots of progress.

I just want to pass this one tidbit of experience on:

When it comes time to tell her how you feel, tell her. If she accepts and returns your feelings, ONLY THEN should you show her how you feel.

I find doing it the other way around becomes awkward and difficult more often than not.

I've had so many failed attempts because I tried to show my feelings, thinking it would mean more. It is sound reasoning, but one of the most difficult things in this life is knowing exactly how someone will receive you. Like my story with Kes, I showed her how I feel, and to this day she doesn't talk to me anymore.

Don't give up, though. Just keep doing what you're doing, since it seems to be working well for you. I hope, just like all the rest hope, this is the last love story you'll have to tell.

I get waht you're saying. Right now I'm just trying to take things one step at a time and looking for that moment when things will come together. I'm not so foolish to believe that this is a sure thing.I know that it may not work out.

But no one has ever made me feel the way she does, so no matter what I have to press on. I can't just let go like I have so many times before without knowing, without trying. She means to much to me not to give it my best.

Wow, some REALLY rough stories. Kind of hurt to read them, especially since I usually listen to music 24/7 on the computer and it had cycled down to Snow Patrol's Chasing Cars...

What really sucks, though, is that I'm about as close to asexual as one can get without actually being asexual, and being painfully awkward I've never really had serious feelings about anyone. Well, there have been a few times when it was close but over the years it's just kind of tapered off to the point where I have about the same feelings for all girls as I do all guys.

Anyway, the one time it was really close was this girl I had a crush on for about three years. She ended up dating my best friend, who was nothing short of a womanizer, and then an older guy who is probably a better choice. They're really close now, though, so that's a good thing. It was quite painful at the time, though.

Yeah. Hmm.